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View Full Version : Quit being lazy and speed up your comp.


pakman21
04-20-2008, 12:06 PM
Everyone knows I hate my computer to no end. It's only got 1.8 gigahertz processor, it has only 223 MB of Ram, it's a piece of ****. I can barely run MSN and FF without it freezing up. But I was able to make it so I can watch videos, msn, and surf the net at the same time (Small feat to you, big step for me) and this is how I did it.

Start>run>%temp%
Delete this ****, it's useless. Be wary, even though most of it is less than a KB, trying to delete it all at once will result in raep.

Start>run>temp
This will take you to the hard drive menu, with all the files on your hard drive. WARNING, DON'T JUST SELECTALL THEN DELETE, YOU WILL **** UP BIG TIME. Go into temp THEN delete. If you selectall then delete, you'll delete your system 32, causing you to die.

Start>run>temp
Now go into your prefetch (Or something like that) and delete useless files, which happens to be all.

Now, you can do this if you wish, or just get CCcleaner.

Now, go into control panel, click themes, and change it to windows basic. XP looks nice and sexy, but it takes up a lot of RAM.

Start>run>cmd

This opens up the command prompt, which is a MSDOS prompt. Now type in "fsutil behavior set disablelastaccess 1" no quotes. Then type in "fsutil behavior set disable8dot3 1" again no quotes.

Start>Control panel > Fonts

Delete unnecessary fonts. Decorative fonts are for ***s anyway. Pretty much all you need are times new roman, veranda and arial.

Start>control panel> add/remove programs

Delete as many programs as you can. You probably don't need 90% of them anyways. Just be wary, once you delete them they can't come back. You might want to make a backup or something.

My comp>C:/

Right click, click properties, and indexing. Turn off indexing. Don't do this until late at night because it'll be long as ****. Literallly a couple days.

Also, defrag at least once a month.

Your computer still slow? Well ****.

CTRL + ALT + DELETE. Then go to processes. Now look at all the processes. lots of 'em, aren't there? Well these are what your computer is running and what are taking up all your RAM. right click on a process, and terminate it. Stay away from anything that says "system service" or "System" . Come to think of it, only delete the owner processes. and NEVER delete Explorer.exe This is your toolbar, your icons, basically your desktop. If you do, just click, file>run then type explorer.exe and it'll fix itself.

Now, is your computer still slow? ****, get a new one.

But for any other information that I'm to damn lazy to plagarize anymore, consult http://partyvan.us/windows_performance.html and the wikihow article.

TheMBros
04-20-2008, 12:24 PM
This is amazing. Thanks.

final_victim
04-20-2008, 12:47 PM
This worked wonders for me.

pakman21
04-20-2008, 01:10 PM
No problem.

final_victim
04-20-2008, 01:14 PM
No problem.

How did you figure all this tech **** out?

pakman21
04-20-2008, 01:18 PM
It's all on wikihow and the partyvan article.

Zero91
04-20-2008, 01:54 PM
I computer isn`t really that bad. Probaly 5.8 gerth prossesor or something. But now it`s freaking fast. Thank you. It download super smash flash in 1 seconds on a browser!

Pollo
04-20-2008, 02:37 PM
Now we just wait and see how long it takes for someone to delete the wrong thing, and start complaining that they had to pay a fortune sending their computer to a tech guy.

Reinstalling Windows for all!

Great tutorial for the competent though!

Mattimos
04-20-2008, 02:40 PM
I like this thread.

Zero91
04-20-2008, 02:41 PM
Now we just wait and see how long it takes for someone to delete the wrong thing, and start complaining that they had to pay a fortune sending their computer to a tech guy.

Reinstalling Windows for all!

Great tutorial for the competent though!That would be awsome. I bet it`s gonna be Fruit. I don`t delete the Temp thoughs cuz I can`t reach it. I won`t bother.

Mattimos
04-20-2008, 02:59 PM
I ABSOLUTELY REFUSE TO CHANGE TO WINDOWS BASIC.

HISSSS

pakman21
04-20-2008, 03:03 PM
I computer isn`t really that bad. Probaly 5.8 gerth prossesor or something. But now it`s freaking fast. Thank you. It download super smash flash in 1 seconds on a browser!

6 gigahertz? That's pretty fricking fast, not to mention not even on the market yet. You probably only have 3 or 4, or you're just plain out lying. Which I suspect.

Great tutorial for the competent though!

Thanks. I love being commended.

Zero91
04-20-2008, 04:24 PM
Sorry I don`t know how much I have. It`s higher than 4 I know that. Gotta check the manual. 2.8 Crap.

pakman21
04-20-2008, 04:58 PM
Sorry I don`t know how much I have. It`s higher than 4 I know that. Gotta check the manual. 2.8 Crap.

Meh. 2.8 isn't too shabby, but it's not nearly 6. I think 3 is pretty standard.

Zero91
04-20-2008, 08:57 PM
Still getting use to the shabby display thing. So square and dull.

Mattimos
04-20-2008, 08:58 PM
Still getting use to the shabby display thing. So square and dull.

That's why I refuse to go to Windows Basic.

Is a little extra speed worth making it look like ****?

loggerbomb
04-21-2008, 08:48 AM
Sorry I don`t know how much I have. It`s higher than 4 I know that. Gotta check the manual. 2.8 Crap.

I was going to say... there is no CPU out there that does 5.8 Ghz stock. None.

Poor Pakman and his ****ty ass computer. You should tell your parents to stop being so cheap and buy some RAM. If you had a Gig of RAM, you wouldn't have to piss around with all the registry editing and what not. Even if you have a craptastic CPU, it is the memory that really holds you back.

Another trick you can do is to increase the size of your virtual RAM or also known as your page file. This is especially helpful if you have little RAM like poor old pakman. Though do not bother if your computers hard drive(s) are full, as it uses the hard drive like spare memory.

To get there go to Control Panel > System > Advanced > Under the "Performance" heading click 'Settings' > Advanced > Advanced - the last heading should be Virtual Memory. Click change and input what the computer suggests.

I also second pakmans recommendation to use CCleaner. It is great and you should use the registry cleaner after everytime you delete a program or once every couple weeks. Windows XP starts to get cluttered up after installing and deleting a lot of crap on the computer and this helps keep the Operating System (XP) in order.

Careful about deleting fonts though. If your like me and use GiMP or another photoshop type program you will want to keep the ones you use as deleting them from the Operating System also deletes them from programs like GiMP too.

People should also get the free trial of DiskKeeper (a very good and fast defrag program - better than the built in one) and use it for the couple weeks they give you. If you do try it out, make sure to defrag your Master Boot File. What this does is is takes your Operating System (XP, Millenium, etc) and defrags it so that it is located in one spot on your hard drive and not all over the place. Doing this will make your computer start up faster and improve OS related tasks.

Also, not sure if pakman's command line prompts are the same, but if you turn off the fancy little effects built into XP, you can gain some speed.

Control Panel > System > Advanced > Performance - Settings > Click on Adjust for best performance.

Oh and pakman, let me know what type RAM you have. I got some older stuff laying around and I will give it to you for next to nothing if you want it.

pakman21
04-22-2008, 01:40 AM
We're getting a new one in a month or so, so your ram isn't needed. Even if you did my parents wouldn't let me nor anyone else actually install it. I can cope with the small amount of RAM I have for the time being.

Unfortunately I want to run my new live CD of ubuntu, but this mother ****er has to have 354 mb...

loggerbomb
04-22-2008, 07:03 AM
Fine than, be that way...

pakman21
04-22-2008, 05:33 PM
Fine than, be that way...

No, I appreciate the offer but my parents are scared of computers. The media has really got to them, they think if you give out your last name on the internet someone will automatically rape you, they think hackers can and will strike at any moment taking all credit card information and destroying your hard drive, and if you open up a computer it will break.

I'm not even exaggerating. I have to steal my music because my parents won't sign up for itunes or any online music services.

pingu887
05-11-2008, 10:53 PM
No, I appreciate the offer but my parents are scared of computers. The media has really got to them, they think if you give out your last name on the internet someone will automatically rape you, they think hackers can and will strike at any moment taking all credit card information and destroying your hard drive, and if you open up a computer it will break.

I'm not even exaggerating. I have to steal my music because my parents won't sign up for itunes or any online music services.

thats tough man:eek: